Melbourne

Made By White 'It's not me, it's you brooch', $35 from WWW.GEORGIELOVE.COM

No one had the heart to tell me I have a giant pimple growing behind my ear. I’m a little disappointed as I’m always the first to tell people about their faults as soon as I spot them. It was only when I was in a change room earlier today that I spotted what looks like a conjoined twin growing out the back of my head. I’m not a violent person, but I am considering using this gun to shoot her dead later tonight.

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